Love: What Matters Most at End-of-Life
“All you need is love, love; love is all you need.”
The Beatles song reckons that what matters in life is love, and Crossroads Hospice, after 20 years and caring for tens of thousands of patients and families, has to agree.
“Patients who are at the end of their life’s journey tell us the things that mean the most to them are their family, the ones they love, and whether they have made a difference in the world,” said Val Criswell, a social worker who oversees emotional support programs for Crossroads in Kansas City, MO. “The special days they choose through Crossroads Hospice’s Gift of a Day program reflect that.”
The Gift of the Day program asks our patients a perfect day, and staff and volunteers work together to make it a reality. Here are some inspiring love stories we’ve been honored to be part of through the Gift of a Day Program:
School house sweethearts: Herman and Mary Weigand were lifelong sweethearts celebrating 64 years of marriage. The two attended the same school house in Dover, Ohio and years later with help of their Crossroads care team, held a gathering for family and friends at the school house, which is now a winery. The icing on the cake? Their son was able to attend from Texas, despite his own health issues.
Wedding bells: Fred Choate was 55 and in love with Patty Hosfield. He also had lung cancer and was on hospice at home. Fred’s perfect day included marrying Patty, the woman who had been by his side for years, and that’s just what happened. In a small ceremony in Fred’s Kansas City, MO home, the couple was wed, surrounded by family, friends and a select few from Crossroads. The hospice supplied the cake, flowers, and photography. Crossroads Hospice’s Chaplain Jean Fox was the ceremony officiant.
A tango for two: Longtime members of the Atlanta Ballroom Dance Club Ed and Gail Egusquiza were passionate about dancing, but missed their dancing days with Ed now in a wheelchair. For his Gift of a Day, the award-winning dance pair attended their annual holiday dance for the first time in years. They spent the evening reminiscing with old friends, reliving some of their best moments together and even taking the floor as a pair once again. Wanting the night to last forever, the couple stayed long past closing.
Tying the knot, and making history: When Jim Obergefell wanted to marry his longtime partner, John Arthur, the union wasn’t yet legal in Ohio, where they lived. Because John had ALS, traveling to another state to legally wed did not seem possible. But the two rallied friends and family, and with support from Crossroads, they flew in a medical jet to Maryland for the ceremony. While the wedding was significant to the pair (and all those who loved them), they weren’t thinking that it was an historic event to anyone but them. However, in 2015 Jim was the lead named plaintiff in the Supreme Court case that led to the legalization of same-sex marriage nationwide. In fact, after the Court pronounced its decision, President Obama said "Americans should be very proud," because small acts of courage "slowly made an entire country realize that love is love."
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